The Da Vinci Code

Instead of writing long emails which may be used against you in court of law, I suggest that our industry adopt the following code words:

Instead of "Breach of Trust" let’s use "cracked egg" [example- We have might have a cracked egg on that last distribution. Or, Are you asking me to crack an egg?]


Instead of "if you don’t do it, we lose the client/account to a competitor", let use "Dante" as in Dante Alighieri’s writings [example- Bob is saying that if the transaction isn’t done by 3pm, the deal will Dante. The settlor will Dante if you don’t issue that POA.]


Instead of saying the tax lawyer is proposing some tax evasion or something illegal, we’ll use "thickness", as in the difference between tax avoidance and evasion has been famously described as the thickness of a prison wall. [example- I think that this transaction has some thickness to it. Or, there is much thickness to the client's Indonesian tax position]


Instead of saying the client or banker has no idea what a trust is, let’s say "half-full" [example- the client is half-full on the idea of a trust]


Instead of telling people to back-date documents, we’ll use "McFly" as in Marty McFly, Back to the Future [example- McFly that Trustee’s resolution to 2004]


Instead of saying your in-house trust expert is a moron, we’ll use "deep-rooted" [example – don’t let him near the client, he’s too deep-rooted. Or His assessment was deep-rooted.]


Instead of saying sham, let’s use "pumpkin" as in Cinderella’s pumpkin [example – this trust could pumpkin on us. Or, This is a pumpkin trust]


Instead of saying "nominee", let’s use "BFF" [example – Ramish the settlor is Santosh’s BFF. Or, can we have a BFF director?]


Instead of saying "who?" as in I have no idea who they are, let’s use "Horton" from Horton Hears a Who! [example – Hey Barclays just hired a Horton. Or, there is a class of beneficiaries that are Horton.]


Instead of saying "we’re caving in to the settlor’s demands", let’s use "amicable". [example- the price reduction is amicable. Or, we are amicable to the transaction proposed.



Happy April Fools